Essays, Poetry, Reflections, Writings, Reviews

This is one of my favorite essays! It is a reflection on the unexpected; how grace can reach the human soul; how miracles can be discovered among the ordinary experiences of life.

Out of Somewhere Comes Grace

by Mary E. Byrne

I've never been the kind of person who has found great solace in taking long walks through the woods, in tune with nature and all its wonders, peacefully counting my blessings to the sounds of bird songs, buzzing insects and rustling leaves. However, it was a spontaneous act of nature I have to thank for yanking me out of an internal tailspin and plunging me into a greater participation in my own life.

It had been the usual kind of day for me at work. My legs throbbed from hanging over the end of a chair for eight hours. My eyes were red and sore for staring at a computer terminal for so long. My mind had shut itself off sometime around mid-morning in a sincere effort to portray the essence of someone truly interested in whether or not the weekly sales quota was going to be met. My soul was full of rage, which I mistook for mere frustration, and I was long past the point where I could ignore the tears that kept welling up in my eyes whenever the phone rang and I had to fake interest in a caller's inquiries. I was hanging on to the tip of a very long rope, and I didn't even know it.

Five o' clock came and I shot out the doors of corporate hell and ran for my car. An intense summer sun had been pounding down on my vehicle all day and I wasn't relishing the drive home without air conditioning. I rolled down the windows, cranked up the radio and headed for the exit. As I turned from the parking lot onto the main road, I was overcome by a sense of coffin-like claustrophobia. All around me were huge glass structures, many stories high, enclosing the very latest in technology, communications, high finance, and inhumanity. I was a nyloned, high-heeled, corporate robot complete with plastic smile and built-in behavior regulators. I was suddenly riding down death row headed for a long stay of execution.

I hit the brakes just in time to avoid a rear-end collision with the car in front of me. Traffic on both sides of the street during the busiest point of rush hour had come to a complete halt. I sat in total amazement as I slowly discovered the reason for this unusual delay.

A family of wild ducks had landed in the jungle of corporate America and were lining up like little soldiers preparing to cross the busy road. One by one, they make their initial harrowing leap from curb to concrete. Mom and Dad duck went first. They sprang off the curb and hit the pavement like true veterans, pausing only momentarily to shake their ruffled feathers back to gleaming perfection. Then came the bravest of the tiny ducklings. He took a few contemplated steps backward, ran to the edge of the curb, and threw himself headfirst on to the asphalt. The remaining five ducklings seized the opportunity and jumped off the side of the curb onto their stunned sibling below. Mom and Dad had already made it to the middle of the street and turned around to see what was happening with the rest of the family. All six ducklings were running to catch up with them. They were a flurry of feathered comedy, tripping and stumbling over each other as they made their way to Mom and Dad. United once again in the center of the road, I watched them reassemble into a fine alignment as they completed their arduous journey.

As the last of the ducklings set foot on safe ground, I looked up and noticed for the first time that six lanes of traffic had come to a complete stop for nearly five minutes, and not once did a horn blow or an impatient driver shout obscenities from a car window. Furthermore, traffic remained at a reverent standstill for quite some time as we watched the duck family waddle out of sight into a roadside ravine.

When we are trapped inside an environment that buries the human soul, we will either be given enough grace to recognize a miracle when it happens, or we will miss the whole point of the show here on planet earth.

One month after I saw the ducks crossing the road, I quit my job. the phone bill was due today, but I could only send a partial payment. My refrigerator isn't as well stocked as it used to be, and even my cat had to settle for a cheaper brand of cat food. My father is worried sick that I have thrown away my future by turning my back on the business world. I'm certainly aware that I'm living each day with a lot more uncertainty than before. It can be very frightening not knowing exactly where I'm headed these days, but it's even more frightening to wake up and loathe where I am.

One thing hasn't changed though, since I made the decision to step off that curb. I won't be turning back. It's straight ahead for the miracles, and an abiding faith that I'll be given the grace to recognize them when they occur.

If you enjoyed these reflections, we invite you to discover other thoughtful and personal writings in the pages of The Best of Pilgrimage and Pilgrimage Vol. 26 and Vol. 27. These can be ordered directly from this website; please click on "How to Order."